Christmas Cards

Christmas Cards


>>HEY NEIGHBORS!
>>WE’RE SO EXCITED TO SEE NEW FACES. IF YOU EVER NEED ANYTHING, WE’RE RIGHT NEXT-DOOR.
>>OH, AND REAL QUICK. NO BIG DEAL, BUT WE NOTICE YOU DON’T LEAVE
YOUR PORCH LIGHT ON AND WE WERE HOPING YOU MIGHT DO THAT.
JUST ‘CAUSE WE HAVE A LOT OF KIDS IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD AND
WE TRY TO KEEP THINGS NICE AND SAFE SO THEY CAN PLAY AT NIGHT.
LIKE I SAID, NO BIG DEAL IF YOU FORGET. I’LL JUST LEAVE A LITTLE POST-IT NOTE TO
REMIND YOU. JUST WANT TO MAKE YOU AWARE.
>>SEASON’S GREETINGS! THE HARTFORD’S.
>>HI HARTFORD’S! THANKS SO MUCH FOR THE WARM WELCOME.
BY THE WAY, THE COOKIES WERE DELICIOUS.>>CAROL, WE’RE SURE TO LEAVE THAT PORCH
LIGHT ON FOR YOU. I NOTICED THAT MOST OF THOSE KIDS PLAYING
OUT THERE ARE YOURS. I ACTUALLY SAW THE YOUNGEST ONE EATING DIRT
THE OTHER DAY AND I THOUGHT, “SO CUTE.”
YOU MUST BE SO PROUD.>>MERRY CHRISTMAS, LOVE THE JONES’.
>>HI JONES’!>>HARD TO BELIEVE IT’S ALREADY BEEN A YEAR.
SEEMS JUST LIKE YESTERDAY YOU MOVED IN.>>JENNIFER, THANK YOU FOR ALL OF THE MAKE
OVER TIPS YOU’VE GIVEN ME. YOU REALLY HAVE SHARED A LOT OF ADVICE ABOUT
IMPROVING MY APPEARANCE.>>WE HOPE YOU ENJOY THE BAKED GOODS WE LEFT
YOU. CAROL REALLY OUTDID HERSELF THIS YEAR.
>>AND THANKS FOR THE ONES YOU LEFT US. OH, THAT’S RIGHT, YOU DIDN’T SEND ANY.
JK, JK. WE KNOW JENNIFER IS REALLY BUSY WITH THE BLOG
AND HER CAT AND WE HAVE SIX KIDS, BUT OH WELL.
>>WE LOVE HAVING YOU AS NEIGHBORS. LOOKING FORWARD TO THE NEW YEAR.
>>OH AND JUST A FRIENDLY REMINDER ABOUT THAT PORCH LIGHT.
WE KNOW IT’S EASY TO FORGET, BUT YOU KNOW, KIDS AND SAFETY!
IT’S IMPORTANT. MAYBE YOU JUST HAVEN’T BEEN SEEING THE POST-ITS
NOTES I’VE BEEN LEAVING.>>ALL OUR LOVE, THE HARTFORD’S.
>>HEY HARTFORD’S.>>YOU TWO ARE THE BEST.
THANKS AGAIN FOR THOSE COOKIES.>>CAROL, YOU ARE JUST THE SWEETEST.
I’M SURE NO ONE WOULD ACCOMPLISH ANYTHING IN THIS
NEIGHBORHOOD IF YOU WEREN’T THERE TO TELL THEM WHAT TO DO
AND HOW TO DO IT ALL THE TIME. AND THOSE POST-ITS ARE GREAT.
YOU MUST BE KEEPING THAT COMPANY IN BUSINESS. THEY MUST LIKE REALLY LOVE YOU.
THAT’S GREAT.>>WE GOT TO HAVE YOU TWO OVER FOR DINNER SOMETIME.
MAYBE NEW YEARS?>>YEAH, CAROL CAN COOK AND I CAN HELP TAKE
CARE OF THAT SMALL ARMY YOU HAVE FOR A FAMILY. DIDN’T THE OLDEST
ONE GRADUATE THIS YEAR?
OH, OR WAS HE THE ONE WHO DROPPED OUT TO START A SKA BAND?
OH MY GOODNESS. I HOPE NOT.
I WOULD FEEL AWFUL FOR BRINGING THAT UP.>>ALL OUR LOVE, THE JONES’.
>>WELL ANOTHER YEAR HAS PASSED AND–>>YET YOU STILL FORGET TO TURN ON THAT STUPID
PORCH LIGHT. TRAINED MONKEYS COULD DO THAT.
EVEN UNTRAINED MONKEYS MIGHT ACCIDENTALLY BUMP
AGAINST THE LIGHT SWITCH. YOU’RE DOING IT ON PURPOSE JENNIFER I KNOW
YOU ARE ON PURPOSE.>>WE HOPE THIS CHRISTMAS FILLS YOU WITH HAPPINESS–
>>SINCE YOUR LIFE IS EMPTY!>>HATE THE HARTFORD’S.
>>LOVE THE HARTFORD’S.>>UH, I’M NOT SURE WHAT’S–>>SORRY ABOUT
THAT PORCH LIGHT CAROL.
MAYBE I NEEDED 10,000 MORE REMINDERS. TOO BAD AN ACRE OF THE RAINFOREST HAD TO DIE
SO THAT WE COULD HAVE YOUR PERFECT POSTED POST-IT
PAPERS. OH, WHAT’S THAT ENDANGERED TREE FROG YOU
WANT A HOME– SMOTHERED BY A POST IT.
>>UH… PERHAPS WE SHOULD ALL JUST–>>YOU KNOW WHAT
MAYBE YOU SHOULD HAVE SAVED ONE OF THOSE LITTLE REMINDERS
FOR YOUR SON. “HEY HONEY, “THIS IS JUST A FRIENDLY
“REMINDER TO NOT DROP “OUT OF HIGH SCHOOL! “P.S. HAVE FUN PERFORMING “FOR THE FIVE
PEOPLE WHO STILL LISTEN TO SKA MUSIC.”
>>ALL OUR LOVE, THE JONES’.>>DEAR JONES’.
>>I WILL END YOU JENNIFER!>>YAY.
MAYBE WE JUST LET THIS GO.>>ALL THE PORCH LIGHTS IN THE ENTIRE NEIGHBORHOOD
WERE MYSTERIOUSLY SMASHED TO TINY PIECES LAST NIGHT.
YOU THINK THAT’S FUNNY? I’LL SHOW YOU SOMETHING FUNNY.
[EVIL LAUGHTER]>>HONEY? HONEY, WHY ARE YOU WRITING OUT THE EVIL LAUGH?
WHY ARE YOU WRITING WHAT I’M SAYING? STOP.
STOP WRITING WHAT I’M SAYING.>>LOVE THE HARTFORD’S.
P.S. YEAH, I WROTE THIS CARD IN BLOOD. GUESS WHO’S?
>>PLEASE–>>WHERE IS MY CAT CAROL? WHERE IS MY CAT?
>>I THINK IF EVERYONE COULD JUST TAKE A STEP BACK.
>>OH WE ARE BEYOND DIPLOMACY NOW. WE CROSSED THAT THRESHOLD WHEN YOU LEFT YOUR
LAST POST IT ON THE BRICK YOU THREW THROUGH OUR WINDOW.
>>OH MAYBE WE COULD GET EVERYONE–>>ENJOY THE PIE I LEFT YOU.
WHAT’S THAT? YOU DIDN’T NOTICE ONE?
OH, THAT’S RIGHT. I LEFT IT INSIDE YOUR HOUSE BETTER FIND IT
SOON BECAUSE THE RECIPE CALLED FOR EGGS, FLOUR, AND NITROGLYCERIN!
HAPPY HOLIDAYS! LOVE THE PEOPLE WHO ARE GOING TO KILL YOU!
>>DEAR NEIGHBORS, THIS IS SUSAN FROM DOWN THE STREET.
LIKED TO ASK YOU TO KEEP THE NOISE DOWN. IT’S LOUD AND FRANKLY RUDE OF YOU.
SO PLEASE SHOW SOME RESPECT FOR THE OTHER PEOPLE ON THE BLOCK.
THANKS AND MERRY CHRISTMAS.>>HELLO.
>>AND MERRY CHRISTMAS SUSAN.

100 thoughts on “Christmas Cards

  1. U know, maybe I’m kinda glad that I only glimpse my neighbors every few months, because dealing with THAT is something I couldn’t handle 😂
    (Also they let me ride my bike in their front yards…..or maybe they don’t, Ive never asked them 😆 but I still do it)

  2. ….Then the wives murder Susan, get sent to prison, and Matt and Jason lived happily ever after together. The End.

  3. The only thing that quickly unites two fighting women is when a third one joins in and becomes both of their new target lol

  4. 0:20 Rubbish! Porch light or no, my parents never let me outside after dark! Besides, some of us want to cut costs as much as we can, and forgive me if I have more important things to care about than another person's kids. Next time anyone leaves a post it, I'm throwing my trash can at their mailbox!

    Love, Gist III

  5. When Whitney said "yeah I wrote this card in blood, guess who's!" I almost thought she killed Matt.

  6. I love how the husbands are just trying to stop them and work it out but the wives never listen to them

  7. Hartfords and joneses- arguing**
    Susan- please stop…
    Hartfords and joneses- SHUT IT SUSAN
    Hartfords Joneses and susan- arguing
    (On the roof)
    Santa- ho, ho, no…

  8. Matt and Jason just look at each other in fear at the end in anticipation of the coming events and I do not blame the men. Their respective wives just had a feud going on for years and now they just joined forces, as what can only be described as Hate-Friends, when someone tried to ask them the be considerate of the rest of the neighborhood. It would be weird if they weren’t scared.

  9. “… so they (the neighborhood kids) can play at night”
    WHAT?! WHAT KIND OF PARENTS WOULD ACTUALLY ALLOW THAT?!
    “It’s loud, and frankly rude of you. Please have respect for other people on the block…”
    YEAH THAT PROBABLY WASN’T THE BEST WAY TO HANDLE THAT!

  10. you can see it in Mallory's and Whitney's eyes that they're not gonna let Susan live past New Years
    you can also see that Jason and Matt are fearing for their lives

  11. Who knew that all of those beauty tips worked for Susan Weebers? Too bad she’s about to get smothered by a post-it.

  12. Omg, Melvin Jones from the photobombing class, and mal, are married and they’re called the jones’s. Oml I never realized!

  13. "Enjoy the pie I left you. What's that? You couldn't find one? Oh, that's right, I must have left it at your house. You better find it soon, because the recipe calls for eggs, flour, and nitro-glycerin!

  14. It's 2019, and I'm re watching some of my favourite sketches, and i only now just realised they have the cat collar 4:48

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