Joanne & The Tree – SNL

Joanne & The Tree – SNL


>>OKIE DOKIE GANG.
FIRST, I WANT TO THANK CARA FOR GETTING US SUCH A GREAT TREE
THIS YEAR. ALL WITH HE NEED IS A VOLUNTEER
TO PUT THIS CRAZY LITTLE ANGEL ON TOP OF THAT TREE.
>>I’LL DO IT, MR. JENKINS.>>JOANNE FROM ACCOUNTING
STEPPING UP. NICE INITIATIVE.
HERE YOU GO. GET IT DONE.
>>SORRY I’M A LITTLE EXCITED.>>GO, JOANNE.
[ CHANTING “JOANNE” ]>>A LITTLE HIGHER, JOANNE.
>>WHOA, WHOA!>>DID JOANNE JUST FALL OFF THE
FRIGGIN’ WINDOW?>>OH, MYnd GO.
WE DON’T EVEN HAVE THE TREE ANYMORE.
>>CHRISTMAS IS RUINED.>>LOOK, THERE SHE IS.
>>OH. STUPID JOANNE.
THIS IS WHAT YOU GET FOR TRYING TO STEP INTO THE SPOTLIGHT.
GUYS, I’M NOT DEAD. CO-WORKERS, I’M SORRY.
I’M NOT DEAD. I’M SORRY FOR THE DRAMA EARLIER,
BUT I’M OUT HERE.>>OH, MY GOD, JOANNE.
SHE’S GOT THE TREE.>>EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE
OKAY.>>YOU SAVED THE TREE, GIRL.
>>TWO FOR TWO ON THE INITIATIVE, JOANNE.
>>OKAY. WELL, I THINK I’M LOSING MY
GRIP. I THINK I NEED TO DROP THE TREE.
>>DON’T DO THAT, JOANNE. WITHOUT THE TREE, THERES NO
PARTY.>>WE CAN SAVE YOU BOTH.
>>LET’S BRING THE TREE IN FIRST SO WE KNOW WE HAVE IT.
>>OR COULD I SUGGEST THAT WE BRING IN MY HUMAN BODY FIRST?
>>JOANNE, STOP TRYING TO CONTROL EVERYTHING.
>>ALL RIGHT. LOOK, I HAVE AN IDEA.
JOANNE, START WHIPPING THAT TREE AROUND.
OKAY? GET A NICE WINDMILL ACTION
GOING. THEN USE THAT MOMENTUM TO FLY
UPWARDS THROUGH THE WINDOW.>>OKAY.
I DON’T THINK I CAN DO THAT. THIS TREE HAS GOT TO GO.
>>DON’T DROP THAT TREE, YOU FRIGGIN’ GRINCH.
NEW PLAN. I’M GOING TO POUR THIS MONSTER
ENERGY DRINK IN YOUR MOUTH. YOU’RE GOING TO GO ALL POPEYE ON
US AND THROW THAT TREE UP TO US LIKE IT’S NOTHING.
>>PLEASE DON’T DO THAT.>>IT’S WORKING.
IT’S WORKING. IT’S WORKING.
>>NO, IT’S NOT WORKING. IT’S REALLY ONLY IN MY EYES.
PLEASE, MR. JENKINS. JUST PULL ME UP.
YOU’RE THE STRONGEST MAN I’VE EVER SEEN.
I CAN SEE YOUR MUSCLES THROUGH YOUR BUSINESS SHIRT LIKE EVERY
DAMN DAY. JUST GRAP MY WRIST.
>>LOVE TO, JOANNE, BUT I CAN’T. I GOT IN A LOT OF TROUBLE AROUND
HERE FOR GRABBING WOMEN’S WRISTS.
I DO WANT TO GIVE YOU SOMETHING. IT’S A PAIR OF WOMEN’S
ISOTONERS. I GOT YOUR NAME IN THE SWAP.
>>THANK YOU, MR. JENKINS, THEY’RE REALLY NICE.
>>HERE’S WHERE YAIRNGEE SWAP GETS INTERESTING.
I’M GOING TO STEAL THE WOMEN’S GLOVES, AND I’M GOING TO GIVE
YOU THE 30 POUND KETTLE BELL THAT FELICIA GAVE ME.
>>THAT WILL DO IT.>>OH, NO.
WELL, WE TRIED. POOR JOANNE.
>>POOR TREE AS WELL.>>ALL RIGHT.
SOMEBODY IS GOING TO HAVE TO SCOOP HER OFF OF THE SIDEWALK
WHEN THE PARTY IS DONE.>>I’LL DO IT.
JUST REMIND ME.>>JOANNE, IT’S ME.
>>SANTA? YOU’RE HERE TO SAVE ME.
NO. SANTA, NO!
NO! [ APPLAUSE ]

100 thoughts on “Joanne & The Tree – SNL

  1. You have John Cena and Leslie Jones in one room and you can't figure out a way to get Aidy Bryant and a tree into a window?

  2. This had to kill John Cena since he is a Red Sox fan even tho , I still ca nt see him waves hand in front of face

  3. So John Cena is the next wrestler Hollywood is grooming to be a movie star, huh? Hmm. Channing Tatum fell off. This motherfucker is being groomed for Channing's spot. May the better bobble head win.

  4. John Cena was cool, but everyone else came off as artificial with how they recited their lines. With better writing and better acting this could've been a lit funnier in my opinion.

  5. So SNL are you gonna hire me to do your visual effects or not? because if these are the minimum requirements I can go all Michael Bay on your ass!

  6. My name is Joann and whenever I need motivation I listen to the encouraging chants of the SNL crew.

  7. I hate when people wanna bitch about the sketch if you don't like it don't comment what you don't find funny guess what someone else will and the show still wins because people will find it funny. There is no need to say it's shit just cause you don't like it. Just dont comment watch a sketch that you do find funny. The sketches cater for everyone so chill out.

  8. is that a bloated Les Nessman? (autoincorrected as "Newsman"! Richard Sanders is a good mild mannered god

  9. You know this only works because she's a fat lady. If it was a skinny girl suffering, nobody would laugh at the cruelty, but we can laugh at fat people suffering. I'm laughing at it, too, but I'm not saying I'm proud of that.

    Also, anybody else at the end where she goes, Santa No! Think of Cory from That's So Raven / Cory In The House saying Daddy, no!

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