MRS. CLAUS IS DYING

MRS. CLAUS IS DYING


Ho ho ho. It’s like I always say, anything is possible with the magic of Christmas. Santa your wife is dying. We’re waiting to hear back from the donor agency. Whenever I’m feeling down I cheer up with a little bit of milk and cookies. Mr. Claus, please focus. As her spouse you have power of attorney. Now I need you to read this over. Everything will be alright with the magic of Christmas. Close your eyes and make a wish for a Christmas miracle. You simply need to believe. Okay Santa, I believe. Time of death, 1:18PM. Ho ho ho, doctor, you’re mistaken. Mrs. Claus is simply napping. She was napping. In a medically induced coma. And then SOMEBODY put milk in her IV. Something tells me she’ll wake up any minute now thanks to the magic of Christmas. Ho ho ho. Ho ho ho. Ho ho ho. Hohoh oh my god what have I done. I’ve murdered my wife. [Johnny Cash’s Hurt] I hurt myself today. To see if I still feel. I focus on the pain, the only thing that’s real. The needle tears a hole. The old familiar stain. Try to kill it all the way. But I remember everything. What have I become. My sweetest friend. Everyone I know, goes away. In the end. And you could have it all, my empire of dirt. I will let you down. I will make you hurt. [jingle bells upbeat jingle]

7 thoughts on “MRS. CLAUS IS DYING

  1. "Doctor, you're mistaken. Mrs. Claus is simply napping!" XD
    Also: I feel like this should be on Newgrounds. Is Newgrounds even still around?

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